New additions to the aquarium

Some shrimp

& gold angelfishies....

Alicia Keys - No One

A new beginning???

As I laid beside you last night I dreamt

dreamt that everything will be ok, that we will be ok and everything will be jolly

Then I wake up to the reality that you will be leaving soon....

walking out my front door, yet again

waving goodbye as the elevator door closes

I don't know what to feel

it all seems a little surreal, we've been here before

time and time again

Got dressed and sat on my lanai for a little while, trying to comprehend

what now? is this really it?

when will I see you again? Will I ever see you again?

It seemed that there was no ending, or no conclusion in our conversation the other night

just random suggestions and no decision, it seems

but I guess maybe thats how its supposed to be

I keep making mistakes and I did again, not minding my own business this morning....Sorry

sorry is never enough,

this whole emotional thing is just driving me out of whack

but its like you can't live without it yet living with it, has not been easy

like I think some time off is a good thing but yet, I don't know if I can do it

You asked me why didn't I make a wish for my birthday,

I stopped wishing a long time ago, or maybe its more like

I do wish, but I just don't believe in it

perhaps it's my lack of believe that makes them not come true

I feel so empty that even tears can't come anymore
Just sitting here in a daze realizing that my shirt is on inside-out
perhaps inside-out shirts do not mean good luck, but is merely a reflection of how I am inside

I stare at the picture on the wall that you drew, still smell you on the pillow

I'm not sure if these are comforts or a reminder of your absence
Thank you for the most wonderful birthday, thank you for being there

Taking it back

This week is horrible
its like everything has just gone horribly wrong, some small request that has just been blown out of proportions and everything is a huge pile of mess.
I feel so alone
I feel like there is nothing I can do, that is right
It just seems like everything I try to do is wrong and is never going to be right
I don't know how to make things right. Even every effort seems like it will be wrong
I don't know what to do and I can't give up
I just want to take it back, take it all back, this whole week.........
every lashing, every word, every mistake, every irrational impulsive move
I'm not asking to turn back time, this is a good lesson
A lesson to step back, take a deep breath, or even sleep on it before making a huge mistake
cause once you make it, you can't take it back, and it makes you feel like shit

De Beers: A Diamond is Forever

Lovely jingle by De Beers. Unfortunately there is no full length version of this song. So for those who don't know what I'm talking about, watch the above. It's a song by Cat Stevens....full lyrics below.

How can I tell you
that I love you, I love you
But I can't think of right words to say

I long to tell you,
that I'm always thinking of you, always thinking of you
But my words just blow away,
just blow away

It always ends up to one thing, honey
And I cant think of right words to say

Wherever I am girl, Im always walking with you
Im always walking with you,
but I look and youre not there

Whoever Im with, Im always, always talking to you
Im always talking to you, and Im sad that
You cant hear, sad that you cant hear

It always ends up to one thing, honey,
When I look and youre not there

I need to know you, need to feel my arms around you
Feel my arms around you,
like a sea around a shore

And -- each night and day I pray, in hope
That I might find you, in hope that I might
Find you, because hearts can do no more

It always ends up to one thing honey,
still I kneel upon the floor

How can I tell you that I love you, I love you
But I cant think of right words to say

I long to tell you that Im always thinking of you
Im always thinking of you....

It always ends up to one thing honey
And I cant think of right words to say

A breather....

I think I have become overbearing of late, even a little annoying at times.
Perhaps due to my lack of daily activities I have found nothing more entertaining than to just show up and smother people with my presence. This is not healthy, I have begun to get bored of myself and I'm sure beginning to make one sick of seeing me.

I have a dire need of things to do. Studying should be one of them but I think my habit of procrastination has made me not able to do so until I absolutely have to. This is bad.....bad bad bad. Cause then, I will be flooded by paper work and subjects that sound like foreign language when the time comes. Literally up to my neck in papers and words.....A lifetime of procrastination can really come back and bite you in the arse. Goodness!!!! arghh..........

Dying Young.....

Dying young.....a movie I remember watching a long long time ago about a young cancer patient
Then I think about the people I know who have cancer, and they are mostly older folks.
Recently however, it seems that this disease is no longer bound by age, or any other factors for that matter.
You think, people who smoke get lung cancer, but so do those who don't!
Those who eat well, live well and exercise lots, still get it. So what is the prevention really??

Despite being able to prolong life, it still has to end at some point. Some, earlier than others.
Back in the days, 40 was old, and now 40 is just the beginning. We have managed to almost double our life expectancy but there are still things we cannot control.
Now, I have known several peers who have been claimed by this disease, none past the age of 30. Cervical cancer at 18, some odd cancer at 17, stage 4 possibly stomach cancer at 26 and another pancreatic cancer at 29. Some have fought long and hard, others suffered for months.
All being said,

My deepest condolences to the families and friends

Blues at the Bay

Zorba - talk about sheer size....

She sure doesn't look that big in the picture but, this dog was 343lbs and 8ft 3inches from nose to tail tip. Surely, the massive mastiff... she was named the worlds largest dog in 1989.

how do you know when you look your worst??

When strangers take the liberty to remind you of that
not by telling you that you look like shit
but just by making that effort to ask you if you are ok
especially when it's many strangers,
then you will really start to wonder if there is a dark cloud hanging over your head

Laughter is the best medicine....they said

Well, we all know where spaghetti comes from now
but back in the days, people are a lot more gullible and a lot less curious.

So, back in the year 1957, on April fools day
the British Broadcasting Corporation tried a startling trick on its news show Panorama.
Journalist Richard Dimbleby offered viewers a tour of a "spaghetti harvest" in Ticino, Switzerland.
"The last 2 weeks of March are an anxious time for spaghetti farmers," Dimbleby earnestly reports as a family was shown plucking strips of pasta off trees. " There's the chance of a late frost, which, while not entirely ruining the crop, generally impairs the flavor." The story concluded, " for those who love this dish, there's nothing like homegrown spaghetti."
After the report ran, the BBC was flooded with calls from people asking where they might get a spaghetti tree. They were reportedly told to "place a sprig or spaghetti in a tin of tomato sauce and hope for the best."

Here's a woman harvesting spaghetti...

The last sunset...

It will never be the same without you...

kelly clarkson: i hate myself for losing you (lyrics)

When someone you love tells you that they doubt you
there is this pain, this emotion thats deep, that hurts
and hurts bad.....
and then you realize,
it's because that love you have, is deeper and profound than you had ever thought it was

8 ways to live longer....

1) Don't sleep in
According to Forbes.com, people who sleep more than 8 hours a night are shown to have a significantly higher death rate, where else people who sleep about 6 to 7 hours a night were shown to live longer. However, party goers beware, because people who sleep less than 4 hours were also shown to increase death risks....



2) Cut back work hours
All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. Sounds very true because increased work hours also mean the lack of physical activity, higher stress levels, higher blood pressures, depression and a whole lot of other problems that can be related with working too much.





3) Half cup full all the way
Living longer starts with an attitude. Optimistic people decrease their risk of early death by 50% compared with those who leaned toward pessimism.






4) Own a pet
Animal lovers would be happy to know that owning a pet can add years to your life. People who own pets, especially dogs have been shown to have lower stress levels and require fewer visits to the doctor as compared to non-owners. Dog owners have also been shown to have a higher survival rate after a heart attack as compared to a person without a pet dog.



5) Quit smoking
This is definitely nothing new: smoking is lethal. It has been shown that middle-aged men who are long-term, heavy smokers face twice the risk of developing more aggressive forms of prostate cancer than men who have never smoked. It's just as bad for women cause smoking ages you.



6) Marry well
Not marry rich, but marry well. Staying happily married for a long time leads to higher life expectancy for both men and women. However, divorcing and remarrying can actually increase the risk of dying prematurely.




7) Body postures
Avoid putting your body through too many physical strains over any lengthy period of time. Sitting down actually puts more pressure on your spine than standing up. So, walk around after sitting at the desk for too long, it may save your life! Also, be weary of lumpy mattresses






8) Chill out
A higher anger response rate leads to higher blood pressure, leading to a likely development of premature heart disease. So, take a deep breath and stop stressing....

Day 5

Tuesdays make me think of you.
As I sit here this rainy morning, it is with a heavy heart that I have decided to go home.
Part of me wants to stay here, to be still physically closer to you though emotionally distant
and the other part thinks that I should leave. Leave to somewhere far, far away, in hopes that the physical distance will help lessen the emotional bond.

Out of sight, out of mind....

I had so much to put down last night, but they all seem to have wandered out of my mind. I have started a new entry, but I don't know what to write anymore.....

Only time.....

I know that it hasn't been that long and that a year can really pass you by, just like that. With the click of a finger, the blink of an eye, before you know it, its been 365 days. Amazing isn't it.....
A decision has been made in the last few days, a decision that I was well aware of. One that probably, I had already made in my mind. Nevertheless, it was not any easier to carry out. With anxiety setting in, the numb limbs and palpitating heart, for a moment I thought I would just pass out. I never thought that a person would ever affect me this way. This was new. I believe that I had never cried so hard or so much in my life. I am sad. For once, I had something to look forward to and now I don't. Now, I have to find something else to look forward to, occupy my time with a whole new array of thoughts and activities. I can no longer think about you. I will no longer be able to talk to you when I want, text you, send you big panda kisses, call you my honey, smell you, touch you, cook for you......

The mere thought of it brings tears to my eyes. Sitting here recording this down, makes me well up with emotions all over again. The longing, the pain, the loss, the love, but, no anger. No anger. I do not think that I am capable of anger at this moment. Of course there are the 5 stages of grief. anger, depression, acceptance, and another two that I don't remember. Perhaps I had already gone through them all. All through the week, all in one day?

As I laid myself to rest my mind was a blank. There was nothing left to think about. Laying on my bed with my trusty pillow, I still can't seem to rest. Putting my head on my pillow makes me think of the chest with the beating heart that I used to rest so well on. The one that will no longer be there, but only survive in my memories. Memories do imply loss, and I have lost you. Maybe this loss is for the greater good. Only time will tell....
Watching you turn your back and walk away, knowing that you will never turn around, thats the most painful memory......I will miss you, very much.

Spoiled - Joss Stone

Puffy's letter...

My love,

I have never known that I was able to feel this way, so stuck, so unwilling to let go, and yet, our lives are so separate. Only intertwining in short moments and some, as almost strangers. This past few days have been very difficult, I know, for both you and I. Moments of almost heart attacks, palpitations, tears, probably even moments where I had forgotten to breathe. For I never understood what it was to fear loss until now, I fear losing you.

I have nothing to offer you that other people cannot. We are all the same, yet different in our own ways. I may not understand you as well, or even know you as well, but I want to. The grass is neither greener on either sides. Its the same grass, just different people to walk on it with.

I cannot guarantee you forever happiness, but I will definitely try my best to work on it. I do not guarantee easy sailing, for there will definitely be hard times. The times where we'd probably ask ourselves what the hell did we get ourselves into? I don't know what is going to happen, in a year, in 10 years. Who does? But I do know that, right now, I want to go through those times with you. Walk with me....

I just thought it was just what I had wanted to say when I saw this on tv, so corny but...
Pick me, choose me, let me make you happy.


The Puffy one

Corinthians 13

Love is patient, and love is kind,
it is not jealous or prideful
love is not rude,
it is not selfish,
it is never angry, it is not happy with evil,
love is not happy with lies, but rejoices in the truth.

Love never gives up,
love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things,
endures all things.

Love never fails.

Another wreck

Dreamt about another car wreck again last night
this time, rather minor
but still disturbing nevertheless
been so sleepless these past few nights
waking up at the oddest hours
feeling fatigued

shit hit the fan and I don't know where to go from here
what now?

Wreck

from the moment I woke up this morning,
it just seemed like something was not right
been dreaming about getting my car wrecked for the past few days
oddly, I was never inside
and no, the car is not wrecked yet, still very much in one piece
as for me?
feeling very uncomfortable

Its an internal conflict
Part of me wants a decision to be made and yet,
the other part just wants to continue on as is....

going on as it had been means that you'll be around
but, how long can this continue????
making a decision means that I will risk losing you, more than likely

life is just full of choices that we sometimes don't want to make
but eventually, we will have to...
I'm sorry that you have to carry this burden
for I am not brave enough
already it feels like little pieces falling apart
a whole melting pot of emotions happiness, sorrow, love, hate, anger, disappointment, longing
all taking turns expressing themselves inside
one after another

having you around,
makes the sadness bearable
amongst this chaos,
somehow there is a comfort that you provide, makes the shortest nap, peaceful

Some interesting quotes.....

Got them from a walk on first friday a while back....
came with some kinda stress wire thing....
this is what happens when you spring clean...
finding crap that you didn't even know you have anymore

" Those who do no know how to weep
with their whole heart, dont know
how to laugh either"
- Golda Meir

" The greatest strength is gentleness"
- Native American Indian proverb

" The fruit of silence is prayer
The fruit of prayer is faith
the fruit of faith is love
the fruit of love is service
the fruit of service is peace"
- Mother Teresa

" If we have no peace,
it is because
we have forgotten that
we belong to each other"
- Mother Teresa

" Because I can no longer ignore death
I pay more attention to life"
- Treya Wilber

" May we see not only
with our eyes,
but with the one eye
which is out heart"
- Black Elk

" People are like stained-glass windows.
They sparkle and shine when the sun
is out, but when the darkness sets in,
their true beauty is revealed
only if there is a light from within"
- Elizabeth Kubler-Ross

" Suppressed grief suffocates, it rages
within the breast, and is forced
to multiply its strength"
- Ovid

" Don't cry because it's over,
Smile because it happened"
- Ted Geisel ( Dr. Seuss)

" Go into your grief for there your
soul will grow"
- Carl Jung

National Rose Month....

Yeah, yeah. So it's a little late in the month, but heck,

Its National Rose Month, JUNE that is...

As of November 20th, 1986 the rose was designated as the national floral emblem of the United States

Some interesting facts about roses:

1. George Washington the first president of the US was also the first rose breeder in the country

2. In 1994, more than 1.2 billion roses were bought by American flower buyers.

3. The rose is native to the US. The oldest focillized imprint of a rose was found on a slate deposit in Florisant, Colorado. It is estimated to be 35 millions years old!!!

4. Nearly 900 acres of greenhouse area is dedicated to the production of fresh-cut roses in the US

5. One acre of rose-producing greenhouses in the US is valued at about $1 million (inclusing the value of the land, structure and the plants)

6. The principal occasions for which Americans purchase roses are Valentine's Day, Mother's day and Christmas.

Here are some secrest to making fresh-cut roses last longer:

1. Be sure to re-cut the stems if they are not delivered in a vase of a container with water. If you do not re-cut the stems, the roses cannot take in water and will likely die within a few hours. Cut the bottom at least 1/2-inch off at an angle, with a clean knife.

2. Use a clean container with clean water, adding the floral preservatives that is usually provided with your purchase. Follow package directions for proper water-to-food ratio. Be sure any leavs that fall below the water line are removed ( leaves in the water promote bacteria, which decreases the longevity of the roses)

3. Place roses in your home, avoiding direct sunlight, drafts and extreme heat of cold.

4. Clean vase every 2 to 3 days wih hot soapy water and a small amount of bleach. Rinse. Add water. Recut stems as above and enjoy!!!

Very impressive.....

Perhaps, love....

Sometimes I sit and think
Of why we go through emotional fluctuations.....
putting ourselves through pain and misery, frustration, anger....
and then suddenly from absolute bliss and happiness
to grief and hopelessness
to dazed and disillusionment in just a second
why why why???
Is this love?
IS this what people call love?
or is it just plain foolishness??
craziness??
or maybe its just hormones having a field day......

sometimes I sit and think
of why I allow myself these feelings....
I had even thought of the moment where this all would mean nothing
the moment where you turn your back and walk away
where we'd pretend to be the perfect strangers
so, why go through all this, when it may eventually come to all that?

Perhaps, love....

As defined as....
a constellation of emotions and esperiences related to a sense of strong affection or profound oneness. The meaning of love varies relative to contect. Romantic love is seen as an ineffable feeling of intense attraction shared in passionate of intimate attraction and intimate interpersonal and sexual relationships. Love can also be construed as platonic love, religious love, familial love, and, more casually, great affection for anything considered strongly pleasurable desirable or preferred to include activities and foods. This diverse range of meaning in the singular word love is often contrasted with the plurality of Greek words for love, reflecting the concept's depth, versatility and complexity.

or is it.....

Jellies you don't want to mess with and their predators...

The jellies....Portugese Man-of-War

Shellfish that eat them....Sand Turtles..

My love, please don't give me memories. Memories imply loss, and I don't want to lose you. --Valen

Free Will Astrology....

mmm......Cheesy chicken mushroom omelette for breakfast...yum..
Having a delightful breakfast at Bogart's on Monsarrat Avenue this morning, browsing through the papers, enjoy the ice cold cuppa H2O.
After standing in the sun and taking pics....

First time I had attended a middle school graduation this morning. Who would have thought???
Middle school graduation, so thats graduation ceremony for finishing standard 6!!
Not too sure if we even have those in M'sia. International schools maybe??
Nevertheless, it seemed a to mean a lot.
To the parents, teachers and students alike. Faces with tears of sadness and of joy within the sea (ok, maybe a pond) of 6th graders. Seems just like an all-round miniaturized version of college graduation.

FYI
Tears of sadness for separation amongst the student....some will go to different high schools
Tears of joy - we're graduating!!!

Whilst sitting at Bogart's waiting for my omelette, I decided to take a look at the Honolulu Weekly, a local newsletter published weekly, usually released on Wednesdays.
Gives you a jif of whats happening during the week, pubs, clubs, parades and what not.

hmm....Ho'olauleia this friday, farmers market on saturday, plays at manoa theatre.....
and then a very interesting astrology section....


Pisces it read....

In the ancient Gnostic Gospel of Philip, discovered in Egypt last century, the author writes of a relationship between jesus and Mary Magdalene. In one place, he says, "Jesus often kisses Mary on the ....." Unfortunately there's a hole in the original document right where that next word was. Did jesus kiss her on the cheek? The mouth? The neck? Unless other versions of the old text are found, we'll never know.
As I read this I was wondering, huh??? Some astrology based on biblical stories??? Weird!
And then it said...
On the other hand, I predict that you will soon solvea comparable mystery in your own love life. Some gap that has long mystified you wil be filled in. A missing clue will turn up.
Now, THAT makes much more sense....Although astrology never really makes sense.

Scorpio reads....

I suggest we title this chapter of you life story "The Perplexing Joy of Hundreds of Emotions," or maybe "The Wild Peace of Way Too Many Emotions."
That may be a bit of an exaggeration, but it's an apt reflection of your immediate future: extreme, expansive, melodramatic, spectacularly educational, and filthy rich with intrigue. You may not break the world record for the most mood shifts in a good cause, but you could very well smash your own personal records.

Ok well, I don't know what to think of that.....good? or bad? If its a good thing. Great! If its bad....er well, keep all breakable items hidden, and cell phones out of sight! Looks like we're in for some stormy or crazy anyhow, weather!!!

Cancer says....

"Quezacoatl instructed the aztecs offer hyacinths and copal (a resin) to their idols instead of human flesh," wrote Edward Dahlberg in his book The Sorrows of Priapus. Alas, the priests didnt heed their god's directive. Their predilection for ripping the hearts out of their sacrificial victims is infamous. Now I'm asking you to attend a less but comparable matter, Cancerian. You have a prime opportunity to stop making an extreme sacrifice you have been doing for a long time. The Gods no longer demand it of you; it serves no holy purpose. There is milder and more useful sacrifice you can make instead.

Catnip.....

Walking by the pet section today, I decided to give catnip another try....

Catnip aka Nepeta is a type of flowering plant in the family Lamiaceae. This type of grass is known to stimulate the cats' pheromonic receptors.

Catnip is native to Europe, Asia and Africa with the highest species diversity in the Mediterrenean region. It is common in North America as a type of weed. They have tubular shaped flowers which are normally blue, pink or purple.

Catnip contains a ype of terpene that is sensed by the cats olfactory epithelium ( tissues in the nose). Draws reactions such as pawing, purring, scratching, rolling, rubbing, licking and salivating from cats. Takes a few minutes to take effect on the cat (or until the cat loses interest) and probably about 2 hours for the cat to reset.

Not all cats are intersted in catnip. This is usually a hereditary trait. About two-thirds or domestic cats are affected by catnip.

The last time I introduced catnip to the cat, she went nuts....plenty of clawing (too young + sharp claws = not good!!!)

Second time around....all the above reactions were observed....interesting.

哭有時，笑有時，歡樂有時，悲傷有時

There is a time for everything......
A time for crying
A time for laughs
A time for happiness
and
A time for sadness

Ever be there crying that does not end, we will dehydrate
laughter that do not cease, we will suffocate
Happiness.....that can do without ending, but that would not be reality
for sadness that does not stop, will make us crazy...

I believe this saying is very true
for there is a time for everything
so boys and gurls,
what is your present time??

Leona Lewis.....X-factor winner...

Papyrus to steel....

Sometimes I wish that
I don't know
or
I don't think
or
possibly, don't care

but,
is that possible.....

no. no. no.

Not that I have not tried,
or just try to pretend I don't see
But
I do.

How does one compare papyrus to steel???
I guess, you can't

For the solid years to compare to
all I have is something abstract, something I can't grasps

I know that jack is comfortable in the box
its like it's self sustaining
like everything is just right

I feel like such an intruder sometimes
intruding upon jack's box
trying to compare papyrus to steel

My love will get you home.....

I've been stuck on this song lately.
It's constantly playing in the series that I'm watching.....

If you wander off too far, my love will get you home
If you follow the wrong star, my love will get you home
If you ever find yourslef, lost and all alone
Get back on your feet and think of me, my love will get you home, boy
My love will get you home

If the bright lights bling your eyes, my love will get you home
If your troubles break your stride, my love will get you home
If you ever find yourself, lost an all alone
Get back on your feet and think of me, my love will get you home, boy
My love will get you home.

If you ever feel ashame, my love will get you home
If it's only you to blame, my love will get you home
If you ever find yourself, lost and all alone,
Get back on your feet and think of me, my love will get your home, boy
My love will get you home.

If you ever find yourself, lost and all alone
Get back on your feet and think of me, my love will get you home Boy
My love will get you home Boy
My love will get you home

My memorial day weekend....

for more pics...click here

Kualoa Ranch weekend....

For more pics from the weekend, click here

The one and only.....Peppa.

Gooey goodness....

Chocolate Souffle from Roy's
This recipe serves 6

1 1/4 C. Sugar
3 T. Cornstarch
12 T. unsalted Butter
1/4 C. Brown Sugar
8 oz. Baking Chocolate
4 Large eggs
3 egg yolks

Place sugar and cornstarch in a bowl and mix until combined.
Melt butter and brown sugar in a sauce pot and bring to a boil.
Add chocolate and let melt
Add melted ingredients to the dry ingredients
Add eggs and egg yolk, mix for 5 minutes on medium ( hand mixer is ok)
Strain and chill overnight.

When ready to bake, spoon into buttered ramekins (3/4 full)
Place in 400F oven for about 22 - 25 minutes.
If over baked............

still taste good, haha

the things I hate about you.......

I hate the way you just dissappear when you are chatting with me, leaving me waiting not knowing if you'll be back or not at all

I hate that you don't know why I'm upset when the only thing that truly upsets me, has to do with you

I hate that I'm not your priority, it makes me feel that no matter what I do, it's just not good enough

I hate having to hide behind cars, inside or in front

I hate having to be weary all the time, having to look left, right, up and down seeking predators that are out

I hate that you make me jealous, never have I been acquainted with jealousy so well

I hate the way you make me smile, even worse when you make me cry

I hate that I don't know what you are thinking, just makes me feel left out and downright nosy

I hate that I feel this way about you

I hate that you can't be there for me when I need you

I hate that I feel lonely when you're not around

and most of all, I hate that I don't hate you

if you know

What its like to observe from afar
to always have to stand behind a veil
to live in uncertainty
never knowing when minds will change or
if people will see
wondering.......
what happens then

but before then.....
emotions fluctuate and minds go crazy
jealousy peaks and so does curiousity
I dont know what to do

I don't know what all this means to you
but it's overwhelming me
I feel like I'm going deeper and deeper all alone
without some to hold my hand
or tell me that everything will be alright

its not alright.....
cause,
while you are sitting home
in your happy little life
I'm not happy

I'm not happy
and it doesn't matter to you
it doesn't matter
cause I say words you don't hear
and cry tears you don't see
perhaps I feel things you don't feel

Supposedly.....

The International Rules of Manhood
1: Under no circumstances may two men share an umbrella.

2: It is OK for a man to cry ONLY under the following circumstances:

(a) When a heroic dog dies to save its master.
(b) The moment Angelina Jolie starts unbuttoning her blouse.
(c) After wrecking your boss' car.
(d) One hour, 12 minutes, 37 seconds into "The Crying Game".
(e) When she is using her teeth.

3: Any Man who brings a camera to a bachelor party may be legally killed and eaten by his buddies.

4: Unless he murdered someone in your family, you must bail a friend out of jail within 12 hours.

5: If you've known a guy for more than 24 hours, his sister is off limits forever unless you actually marry her.

6: Moaning about the brand of free beer in a buddy's fridge is forbidden. However complain at will if the temperature is unsuitable.

7: No man shall ever be required to buy a birthday present for another man. In fact, even remembering your buddy's birthday is strictly optional. At that point, you must celebrate at a strip bar of the birthday boy's choice.

8: On a road trip, the strongest bladder determines pit stops, not the weakest.

9: When stumbling upon other guys watching a sporting event, you may ask the score of the game in progress, but you may never ask who's playing.

10: You may flatulate in front of a woman only after you have brought her to climax. If you trap her head under the covers for the purpose of flatulent entertainment, she's officially your girlfriend.

11: It is permissible to drink a fruity alcohol drink only when you're sunning on a tropical beach... and it's delivered by a topless model and only when it's free.

12: Only in situations of moral and/or physical peril are you allowed to kick another guy in the nuts.

13: Unless you're in prison, never fight naked.

14: Friends don't let friends wear Speedos. Ever. Issue closed.

15: If a man's fly is down, that's his problem, you didn't see anything.

16: Women who claim they "love to watch sports" must be treated as spies until they demonstrate knowledge of the game and the ability to drink as much as the other sports watchers.

17: A man in the company of a hot, suggestively dressed woman must remain sober enough to fight.

18: Never hesitate to reach for the last beer or the last slice of pizza, but not both, that's just greedy.

19: If you compliment a guy on his six-pack, you'd better be talking about his choice of beer.

20: Never join your girlfriend or wife in discussing a friend of yours, except if she's withholding sex pending your response.

21: Phrases that may NOT be uttered to another man while lifting weights:

(a) Yeah, Baby, Push it!
(b) C'mon, give me one more! Harder!
(c) Another set and we can hit the showers!

22: Never talk to a man in a bathroom unless you are on equal footing: i.e., both urinating, both waiting in line, etc. For all other situations, an almost imperceptible nod is all the conversation you need.

23: Never allow a telephone conversation with a woman to go on longer than you are able to have sex with her. Keep a stopwatch by the phone. Hang up if necessary.

24: The morning after you and a girl who was formerly "just a friend" have carnal, drunken monkey sex, the fact that you're feeling weird and guilty is no reason for you not to nail each other again before the discussion about what a big mistake it was occurs.

25: It is acceptable for you to drive her car. It is not acceptable for her to drive yours.

26: Thou shalt not buy a car in the colors of brown, pink, lime green, orange or sky blue.

27: The girl who replies to the question "What do you want for Christmas?" with "If you loved me, you'd know what I want!" gets an Xbox. End of story.

28: There is no reason for guys to watch Ice Skating or Men's Gymnastics. Ever.

We've all heard about people having guts or balls. But do you really know the difference between them? In an effort to keep you informed, the definition of each is listed below.

"GUTS" is arriving home late after a night out with the guys, being assaulted by your wife with a broom, and having the guts to say, "are you still cleaning or are you flying somewhere?"

"BALLS" is coming home late after a night out with the guys smelling of perfume and beer, lipstick on your collar, slapping your wife on the ass and having the balls to say, "You're next!"

We hope this clears up any confusion.

The International Council of Manhood, Ltd.

Au revoir, hsiao min...

A need or a want?

A friend just brought up a question about relationships
In this point in time, is it a need or a want?
the argument was that
if it was a want, that we would not make the necessary compromises to attain it
but if it was a need
it's something one cannot live without
it's more than a question of just missing someone and wanting to see them
its more a life and death situation in a way of saying...
then we would do anything for it

How would you know if it's a need and not a want?
They both have the same symptoms
how does one diagnose a situation like this?

Its a matter of severity, I guess
you can live without something you want
but not without something you need
a want is a passing fancy
a need is forever

A want does not mean you don't love
just not enough
not enough to be willing to take risks for

A need, you will do anything for
leap from a plane or dive in the deepest oceans.....

No Me Ames

Dime por qué lloras
De felicidad
Y por qué te ahogas
Por la soledad
Di por qué me tomas, fuerte así,
mis manos, y tus pensamientos te van llevando

Yo te quiero tanto
Y por qué será
Loco testarudo, no lo dudes más,
aunque en el futuro haya un muro enorme,
yo no tengo miedo, quiero enamorarme.

No me ames, porque pienses que
parezco diferente
Tú no piensas que es lo justo,
ver pasar el tiempo juntos
No me ames, que comprendo,
la mentira que sería.
Si tu amor no merezco, no me ames,
mas quédate otro día

No me ames, porque estoy perdido,
porque cambié el mundo, porque es el
destino, porque no se puede, somos un espejo,
Y tú así serías lo que yo
de mí reflejo
No me ames, para estar muriendo,
dentro de una guerra llena de
arrepentimientos, no me ames para estar
en tierra, quiero alzar el
vuelo, con
tu gran amor por el azul del cielo

(SHORT BREAK)

No sé qué decirte, esa es la verdad,
si la gente quiere, sabe lastimar
Tú y yo partiremos, ellos no se mueven,
pero en este cielo sola no me dejes

No me dejes, no me dejes, no me escuches,
si te digo "no me ames".
No me dejes, no desarmes,
mi corazón con ese "no me ames"
No me ames, te lo ruego, mi amargura, dèjame
Sabes bien, que no puedo, que es inútil,
que siempre te amaré

No me ames, pues te haré sufrir con este
corazòn que se llenó de mil inviernos
No me ames, para así olvidarte de tus días grises, quiero que me ames
sólo por amarme
No me ames, tú y yo volaremos,
uno con el otro y seguiremos siempre juntos
Este amor es como el sol que sale tras de la tormenta
Como dos cometas en la misma estela

Apparently, as a woman we.....

Spend 3.5 hours a day, in a bad mood...

Laugh 18 times a day on average

That only 30% of young women say they're "very happy"

27% of us, turn to comfort foods to improve moods

A whopping 80% say they feel emotional the day before their period begins

Only 2% say that they're in a cheerful mood everyday

We're only experiencing a normal emotion when we say "I'm fine" even though we're fuming.

85% of women say they feel relieved after a good cry

Have an average of 5 crying spells a month ( goodness...really???)

Feel happier after being hugged, cause it takes only 20 seconds of contact for your body to release mood boosting hormones....oxytocin ( so multifunctional...)

Get a rush from being in love....apparently the euphoria of a new relationship lasts for up to a year, hmmmm....

The Death of a blog...

the death of a blog happens when the blogger is done writing
when privacy wants to be resumed
when there is nothing to be announced to the world anymore....

Year of the Fire Pig

Forget everything you know about the easy going, laid-back, roll-in-the-mud Pig. This is the year of the Fire Pig, and there will be fireworks aplenty. It should be a feel-good year loaded with excitement.

Water is the Pig's fixed element. In Chinese astrology, Water plus Fire equals disaster. Also, the fifth month of the Chinese calendar is the month of the Fire Horse. This will be a time of daring accomplishments and serious calamities.

The Fire Pig is nevertheless a Pig, and we need to remember what that means for us. The Pig is the 12th and last sign of the Chinese zodiac. We have come to the end of the cycle, and it's time to celebrate our accomplishments. Yes, it's party time! Be good to yourself this year; you've earned it. Family reunions, extended vacations and a spa membership are in order.

Like last year's sign, the Dog, the Pig calls us to focus on family. Now we need to concentrate more on relationships. It's a Fire year, a year filled with passion. What a great time to begin a new romance or take an existing one to a new level -- a vacation in Paris or Bali might be just the thing. When is the last time you shared a hot tub with your sweetheart? Make it a priority this year.

The West has their fat cats and the Chinese, their fat pigs. We're talking money! Yes, this is a year to make more than a little, so be alert for opportunities.

It may seem incongruous to link the Pig with scholars, but the association is there; and it's a positive one, due in part to the fact that the Pig's fixed element is Water. This could thus be a very good year for those in academia.

Although Pig is the last year in the 12-year cycle, it is only the 24th in the larger, 60-year cycle. At this point it should be emphasized that 2007 is a Fire year. This is not a year for the faint of heart. On the positive side, Fire provides each of us the energy we need to initiate action, regardless of whether or not immediate attention is required. It is not a time to sit on the sidelines.

Fire and Pig together call us to work on vigorously attacking existing projects and completing them. It is not a particularly favorable time to conceive of and begin new ventures. With the clash of Fire and Water, now is not the time to take a lot of risk. Use the energy of positive Fire to raise your work level to a high intensity, but avoid the foolhardiness associated with negative Fire, and your business interests will prosper.

Since this is a Fire year, those people born in an Earth year will generally fare better than others of their animal sign, while those born in a Metal year are likely to do worse than those born in Wood, Fire, Earth and Water years.

Health issues vary not only by sign but by individual. Your best bet is to visit a Chinese doctor to have your balances checked and get some advice for the coming year. It is a Fire year, so one thing we can say in general is to be on the lookout for signs of stress and a tendency to overextend one's self.

2007 will be an exciting year. We will experience passion and crises on and off throughout the year. The Pig is a go-with-the-flow type. If you follow the Pig's example by enjoying life's pleasures and heating up your relationships, this will be a very memorable year indeed.

Drowning....

Sometimes, I feel like I'm drowning....
in a sea of emotions suddenly overcomed by everything
feeling overwhelmed and consumed
I'm restless yet exhausted
so tired,yet afraid of the outcome if I were to stop kicking
considering as the odds are against me
will I drown and sink to the bottom?
Or float?
Never have I felt to helpless, so spent
so deep in the abyss
so............choked

Wants...

Initially when you ask someone what they want in life
or where do they see themselves 5/10 years from now
they will say
working, successful, rich perhaps
they see property, they see travel

Yes, that would be a nice addition to life
but its all abstract, material goods....
what about life itself?

I thought, those things, materials, would be nice
but I dont think I will be truly happy with those things
at this point, I think it's more about the quality of life
rather than the quantity you can gather while living

People in general are pretty simple creatures
all we want is to love and be loved in return
to be happy, to live well, live healthy, good food, great friends,
a full, satisfying life...

Life.........

I'm sitting here thinking

of how fragile life is

how we unknowingly take the time we have for granted

and then suddenly

its gone, taken away.

i'm thinking

what if, today is the last day?

what if there is no tomorrow....

would there be many things that I still want to do

Places I want to see, people I want to meet

things i want to say........

there would be,

so much I still want to do

so many places I still want to see

people I want to meet/see again

unspoken words, unfulfilled dreams

Carpe Diem they say, seize the day

I don't think i have been seizing my days

I don't think many people have

we thread lightly and live too carefully

too worried about what others might feel or think

try to fit into the norm and blend into the sea of people

all held up by responsibilites, worries, and a so called life

How do we really seize the day?

I don't know....

does one say what they want to say

act as they please

can we actually live without putting ourselves in the confinements of the norm?

How does one be truly happy?

be able to go to their death bed with absolutely no regrets

and say i'm ready

my prayers go to you B

to stick or twist...

Wondering what that was when I saw it on a friends msn name
and so I asked, how can I not??

a poker term meaning
to stick with the current hand, or to move on and win (or risk losing)
he explained that it applies to life in general,
decisions we make
roads we choose
its all a gamble...
just like what Forrest Gump's mom says about the box of chocolates
that we don't know what we're gonna get (though untrue these days)
the choices that we make everday,
walks us down paths that we cannot predict
thats what's called,
the twist of fate

Guess this is a question we ask ourselves everyday....

Meet Chip

Why am I the last to know?

Why do you tell me things in the last hour?
Do you feel like its unnecessary to tell me?
Do I not deserve to know?

scattered thoughts

"There are no guarantees.
From the viewpoint of fear,
none are strong enough.
From the viewpoint of love,
none are necessary.

Randomness is truly.....random
thougths are scattered and uncollected
this is no discussion for its merely a collection of
things that run through my mind

I find that I'm not too good at expressing myself
can't do it through writing, cause that requires too much thinking
and when I think, I filter, and when I filter,
it's not really what I'm thinking anymore
but probably
a lighter less intense version

As for speaking,
requires thinking also for I'm not one that speaks my mind
unless it does not involve myself

Actions however I think
are my truest form of expression.
I may not speak, but I act upon

I'm good at telling other people what to do
but I never listen to myself
not that I don't want to
but dishing out is way easier than taking in.....

How does one know if something is worth waiting for?
is there a sign? just a feeling?
any scientific proof or strong evidence
or is everything just abstract,
something you can't see nor touch

Love is an illusion
what issit? what does it look like?
is there a smell? or feel to it?
how does one know when it is encountered
we hear of it, but how many actually know what it is
Unrequited love is not love
for it is just a one sided illusion of butterflies and rainbows
a shiok sendiri fantasy
which when awaken from, hurts like hell

Would one rather be loved, or love?

Would you rather have 1 year of mind-blowing sex followed by 4 years of celibacy
or 5 years of mediocre sex?

Would you rather not eat chocolate for the rest of your life or attend a party in your birthday suit?

Would you rather gain 20lbs or age 20 years?

Would you rather age from the neck up or neck down?

Questions, questions
aren't they the parts of life that makes everything a litte more interesting
keep those mind juices flowing...

Obstacles and hurdles.....

Obstacles don't have to stop you.
If you run into a wall,
don't turn around and give up.
Figure out how to climb it,
go through it,
or work around it.

- Michael Jordan -

Do obstacles really make us treasure something more?
Is that what they are there for?
Does this mean that if something were smooth sailing all the way
that we won't hold to it as dearly?
Is that what hurdles in life are for?

People tell me all the time that
if you get something easily, you won't treasure it
it's the obstacles that make you treasure your possession more....
The harder you work to get something,
the more effort you put into acquiring it
the more blood, sweat, and tears....
the more meaningful

Makes me think to myself
how close to the truth is this?

Does food you make, taste better than the food you buy?
not necessarily, but you sure as hell put some effort into and
am going to try to eat it, even if its bad....
can't be THAT bad anyway

Does a relationship that you worked harder for mean more?
Does an article you spend more time and effort on mean better work?

I can't think of logical questions at the moment
but I do think that its pretty clear what the verdict is

This does not hold true to all situations, there will be exceptions
there are always exceptions to the rule...
To each is own what they find are important to them
and what they choose to hold near and dear
other people may disagree
but who are we to judge

the CGoh....recipe for love

THE recipe:
1 bag of LOve
2 satchels of trust
2 satchels of communication
1 pack of commitment
6 cups of LUst
A dash of patience
A tablespoon of forgiveness
1 litre of compromise
1 slab of respect
An injection of fresh air
Cook at a slow simmer

GIVES YOU THE near PERFECT RELATIONSHIP.

Attachment....

Defined as
1. An act of attaching or a state of being attached
2. A feeling that binds one to a person, thing, cause, ideal, or the like; devotion;
3. An additional or supplementary device
4. Something attached, as a document added to a letter.

My, my, how many way a word can be defined.
language is such an amazing thing with each word having one/multiple meanings....

Search in the dictionary and one shall find
we can use such words in different applications and mean totally different things


like being attached to ones....car
there is only one way to describe this kind of attachment
it is the state of being attached.
a state where one feels an unsettling discomfort to let go

its funny how as humans we get attached to things
to people
and what do we do about this attachment....
how do we "solve" it
unable to just unattach like documents to an email,
guess, we'll just have to wait it out....
or stick with it.

Chinese New Year goodies.....mmmmm

For more pics click here....

A little sumthing sumthing for this Vday

Was reading though O magazine and found some meaningful thoughts for this Valentines day.

Of course,I do believe that there is not really a reason to choose a specific day in the calendar to celebrate ones love....

Valentines can be everyday! or not...
no one needs a day on the calendar,
or some card designing company
to tell them
when to give loved ones flowers, chocolates, etc...
But hey, its valentines, so....

Enjoy, Indulge and remember....

"I have found that to love and be loved
is the most empowering
and exhilarating
of all human emotions."
- Jane Goodall -

"Still I enjoy
the long sweetness of
simultaneity,
yours and mine,
our and mine...."
- John Ashbery -

"Love is our true destiny.
We do not find the
meaning of life
by ourselves alone,
we find it with another."
- Thomas Merton -

" Love is my decision
to make your problems
my concern."
- Robert Schuller -

My lovelies...

The tilted one...